My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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