so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
