That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
