That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
How naked do you want me to be?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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