theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
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Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
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I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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