apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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