operation have a gay friend backfired
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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