wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
