i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
