Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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