Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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