I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Randomize
