im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
