I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Still dying that you shit outside
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize