I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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