just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
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