hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
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