You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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