my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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