Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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