the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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