Pants 0. Shit 1.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
they're like a gay fantastic four
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Randomize
