Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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