That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
