i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize