that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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