whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Randomize
