you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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