I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize