One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
