You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
