a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
