we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize