i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
