no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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