I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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