You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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