There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I bet he comes in French.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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