ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
