Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
