Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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