do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
you didnt know i had herpes?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
