What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
