Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.

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(469): View more from Texas

Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take

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(701): View more from North Dakota

That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.

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(905): View more from Ontario

No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf

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(206): View more from Washington

Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.

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(847): View more from Illinois

I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.

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(478): View more from Georgia

You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable

(318): View more from Louisiana

You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.

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(480): View more from Arizona

And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.

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(817): View more from Texas

Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair

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