Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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