she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
