so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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