New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I forgot how hot balto sounded
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize