when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize