I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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